« When Death Becomes a Solution... | Main | Departure »
June 30, 2005
A Step Back
Email from a colleague after I shared with her about my suicidal Wednesday evening:
***
Dear brother-in-Christ,
I fully understand your situation and as a body in Christ, I feel the pressure and anxiety you are going thru. Please learn to trust God and not let your imagination go wild, being human we tend to let our flesh take control and brush the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Do you know who God is? If you know Him, you will believe that His power for surpassed any other forces here on earth, because He created the Heavens and Earth and everything single thing here on earth is under His control. As the Bible says the even know the number of hairs on our head. He even knows what you are going thru right now, you are confused, disillusioned, anxious, discouraged and despaired. He understands all that you are going thru, but if only you can quiet down your thoughts and let the spirit of God minister to you, you will triumph over the situation. I gathered that you have a great deal of preconceived ideas of the place that you are going to, perhaps they can be real but so what, no place is an ideal place to work. As Christians we are placed in this world to overcome evil, whether we like it or not we have not choice. Just like me, when I was transferred here, had I got the choice? I was just like you, so overwhelmed with fear and dread and had even contemplated resignation. But I couldn't because that was just a month after I joined XXX where I had been out of job for 2 solid years, and believe me, I went to beach every day at Changi, spent time talking to God and poured out my sorrow into the deep sea. I bet the sea was not deep enough to contain my grief. Just imagine, I was caught in a dilemma with savings depleted and here am I being asked to go to another department after a month. Can you imagine my feelings at that moment, I almost went to the place I am that I got so familiar with and never returned, but I bite the bullet and went thru this hurdle it was very difficult, it's like against all odds. God saw me thru, though I am doing that well here and the pay is a far cry from my last drawn, I have to hang on because of my aged parents and also because of the love of God that kept me. I understand why God allowed me to go thru the fire, so that I can come out to comfort another (you) that He will surely see you thru. There is nothing He cannot do, and nothing is impossible with Him.
Go with an open mind, sometimes we need to adjust to situations as well as people. Things may not be that rosy as you think but who knows what God can do? Think positive and look at the bright side and soon your thoughts and dreams will turn to reality.
Nowadays, people are fighting very hard to climb the coroporate ladder tagged with a "big appettite" in making plenty of money. They seek after things at the expense of their health and what's worst trade in their souls in exchange for the pleasures and materials of this world, without realising that ultimately we will have to give up these possessions when we die. Perhaps they know, but yet they still pursue them, don't ask me why? I can't answer this question. Try to rationalise things, is it worth dying for it? If God closes one door He'll open another, if you only trust Him. When you are out of the dark cloud, you can look back and say what a silly thought! Don't reprimand yourself, we are all human, anybody can think and feel irrational when things are not smooth sailing.
Take heart my brother and may the Word of God minister to you.
2 Corin 4 : 8 "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; pesecuted, but not abandoned, struck down, but not destroyed".
Prov 3 : 5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight".
In Christ's Love
XXX
***
Suicide Scale (1 - 10): 7 (Moderate)
Posted by D W at June 30, 2005 05:43 PM